Friday, April 13, 2012

To Say Goodbye [FMF]

Generally, I hate goodbyes.
Too often, just as I'm getting settled in and comfortable, the end comes and I find myself reluctantly raising a hand to wave.
I'm not much for change; I prefer the status-quo.

That is, until now.

image credit

This year has brought the biggest, most life-changing goodbye I've ever experienced-
I've said goodbye to myself.
Not even wanting to turn back, I have about-faced, leaving that loud-mouthed, selfish, lukewarm girl behind.
I wasn't trying to get rid of her...
but God was.
He'd been trying- calling and prodding- for years, and every single time I'd ignored, done my own thing, and been happy about it.

I thought I had everything I needed and I was happy to check the boxes, but I was dying.
Falling farther away from where I needed to be.
Missing the point.
Rebelliously shouting "NO" in His face.

He's bid me come and die.
He's asked me to get rid of her forever.
He's given me a reason to turn.
To say goodbye.

"But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ.  Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord." (Philippians 3:7-8)


Nikki said...

dye to self is the best goodbye out there.
proud of you.
love your 5 minute write...

MTereasa said...

These words are so encouraging!  It it is a beautiful thing to say goodbye to one's self, even when it hurts!


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